


All The Things Preferable To Staying Awake

by PeopleAreScary



Series: A Truly Shitty Day For Literally Everyone [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Crack, Cuddling, Cuddly Loki, Getting Together, M/M, Tired Tony Stark, i think, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-02
Updated: 2019-07-02
Packaged: 2020-06-02 21:51:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19450213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PeopleAreScary/pseuds/PeopleAreScary
Summary: It had probably been too much to demand that at least one day this week didn`t turn out like total shit.In which Tony Stark is really exhausted and really doesn´t need to be kept awake by the norse god who just appeared in his bedroom (so he just sleeps anyway).





	All The Things Preferable To Staying Awake

**Author's Note:**

> I apologize in advance for any errors. I don´t have a beta and English isn´t my first language. I also tend create a horrid mix of British and American English, so... I hope it isn´t roo terrible? Enjoy??

It had probably been too much to demand that at least one day this week didn`t turn out like total shit. On Monday, there had been no less than twelve giant laser-chickens rampaging through downtown.  


Tuesday had brought some sort of ancient entity, convinced, their one and only mission was to tinge the entirety of New York in a bright pink (admittedly, Tony did laugh after Cap had been hit with the spell and suddenly looked like he was sponsored by Hello-Kitty. It was less fun after Tony met the same fate. The spell was apparently permanent and paint resistant. Originally, Tony wanted to retire the suit, but after a news outlet attacked the pink for apparently being ‘not manly enough’ Tony had gotten even more pissed and started wearing pink everywhere, just on principle alone. After all, bedazzled and pink did suit him).  


Wednesday, Clint and Natasha had gotten into a fight and everything went downhill from there for absolutely everyone. There were few people one wanted to be less around when they were angry than two incredibly dangerous spy-assassins without something really resembling a moral compass. Especially if they were as petty as Clint. And both expect you to take their respective side.  


And so on went the week with an over proportional number of lab-explosions (12.93% more than average, according to JARVIS), annoying, self-proclaimed villains, and a pissed of Pepper. The last one was the scariest. In the midst of all this, Tony had neglected sleep and general nutrition apart from copious amounts of coffee. Now he was just about ready to give in to JARVIS´ nagging and collapse on his bed to sleep for at least like four hours. More really couldn´t be expected of him.  
But of course, just when he was about to fall asleep, Loki had to materialize out of thin air on his bed. Fucking Loki. Tony elected to ignore him in favour of sleeping. So what if he was definitely going to get killed in his sleep? At least then he wouldn´t have to worry about tomorrows problem which was probably going to be the apocalypse, considering the way things were progressing at the moment.  


Loki did not seem to agree with his decision, if the way he had started poking Tony in the side said anything. Reluctantly, he opened his eyes a bit and shot Loki the meanest if-you-don´t-leave-me-alone-I-am-probably-going-to-murder-you look he could muster and muttered a grumpy “What?”  


Apparently, the actual thousands of years old god of lies and mischief and fire and probably some other shit like ridiculous helmets was not impressed and gave Tony a look that probably ranged in his top three of vaguely-annoyed-by-peasant faces. Tony was almost proud of how much of a response he was able to garner from Loki.  


“Your assistance is required in a delicate manner”  


That was almost enough to get Tony´s interest. The god rarely ever admitted to needing help and even less so from Tony. Which was what led him to the conclusion that this was probably a prank that could wait until he woke up again (or forever, but the chances for that were pretty much non-existent). Therefore, Tony resolved to once again close his eyes and go back to sleep.  


Plans that were rudely interrupted by a pointed push and his subsequent arrival on the floor. Yikes.  


“Can´t you just get literally anybody else to do it for you? Somebody who isn´t an insanely hot and insanely tired genius billionaire?”  


In answer, Loki just slightly lifted one of his unfairly pretty eyebrows a bit. Bastard probably didn´t even have to work on looking flawless. Asshole. He sighed and slowly lifted himself off the ground to crawl back on his bed. For a few moments he stared at Loki in the hope that he would just start talking by himself, to go away again, preferable the latter. None of it did happen. When the silence was just about to move from uncomfortable to straight up frightening, he decided he should probably do something.  


“So… what exactly do you need me for?”, he asked. Loki did not seem compelled to answer. After a few moments of renewed silence during which Tony frantically tried to come up with something else to say, Loki finally opened his mouth again.  


“I happen to find myself in a quite... complicated situation at the moment”, he said, without giving anything else away. Damn the stupid god of lies and his stupid poker face. And also the fact that he still hadn´t told Tony what the fuck was even going on.  


“And that complicated situation is…?” prompted Tony who was known for many things, none of which were his patience.  


Loki really seemed to resent talking at the moment. So much for silver tongue. Tony briefly considered poking him, but dismissed the idea quickly, as it appeared to be ‘incredibly stupid and bad for his immediate health’. He didn´t have to wait as long as the first time anyways.  


“It is possible that, under circumstances, I may have angered someone more than intended and am now in need of a temporary refuge.” Was Tony going mad or did Loki actually just blush admitting this? And what was he even admitting? Tony furrowed his brow and stared in a way some might have described as ‘flabbergasted’; a word that should most definitely never be used in reference to Tony Stark, inventor extraordinaire, always on top of things and never surprised if you asked him. (Not that anybody ever did ask, those traitors.) This thinking process might have taken him a bit longer than usual to complete than normal, due to Tony being on the bridge of physical collapse. But only maybe. Perhaps. Probably.  


Eventually, he came to his conclusion: “You pranked someone above your calibre and decided to hide out in _my_ bedroom in _my_ penthouse? _Why?_!”  


This was possibly the first time Tony had seen the closest thing to a personification of chaos (apart from himself, obviously) truly embarrassed. He decided to take lack of an answer as a ‘yes’. Which still didn´t explain why his part-time enemy and full-time menace had come to him.  


Tony attempted to communicate this concern by staring at Loki a bit longer. He seemed to be doing a lot of that today anyways, so he might as well go full out. Who even cared anymore, madness had obviously taken over. (Though it should be said that at this point, Tony had not quite given up the hope, that this might all be an exhaustion induced hallucination yet. He did indeed hope for this alternative.) Finally, he ran out of his extremely limited patience once again – to him the passing time had seemed like an eternity, to the actual time it had seemed like exactly 12.43 seconds – and opened his mouth once again. Loki, surprisingly enough, beat him this time.

“There aren´t any other places I can go right now. This is the only non-magical location with adequate defence I could think of”, he muttered, quite obviously not willing to discuss the issue further. A muscle in his left hand twitched. If he didn´t know better, Tony would almost say he was trying not to fidget. Which was completely illogical, because gods simply _did not_ fidget. He ascribed it to further hallucinations and interpreted as a sign he should most definitely go to sleep now. With or without Norse god in his bed. (Somehow, whenever Tony had thought of this scenario before (which he of course hadn´t), it had turned out a lot less PG-rated in his head.)

“Do I need to be awake for this or can you cope if I´m asleep while you sit around? Because, if you say it´s the first, I will kill you with my own hands.” This statement possibly could have been more intimidating if it wasn´t murmured into the pillow Tony hadn´t noticed until then his head had sunken into. Or if the last half wasn´t completely ruined by the fact that Tony had already fallen asleep.

Loki didn´t wake him.

* * *

  


Approximately four hours later, Tony woke up with a start and probably would have sat upright in bed if it weren´t for something heavy holding him down. This something heavy as it turned out, happened to Loki. Loki, asleep. Tangled around Tony in his best impression of an octopus. What. The. Fuck.

While his memories of the previous night slowly returned – accompanied by a lot of muffled curses from Tony, it was a wonder what a few hours of sleep could do for one´s mental health and survival instincts – he tried to slowly dislodge himself from the very dangerous person in his bed. Who could kill him. And was using him as a human-sized teddy bear. A teddy bear he apparently wasn´t willing to let go of, judging by be way held on to Tony and pressed him closer to himself when he tried to escape. Fuck. Desperate times called for desperate measures.

“JARVIS?” Tony whispered as silently as humanly possible in hopes of not waking his current … attachment. Said attachment wrinkled his nose in his sleep – and god fucking damn it, he was not supposed to look this cute – and went on to burrow his nose in Tony´s chest.

JARVIS did not answer. Tony became just a slight bit more afraid of his life. Not that he wasn´t before, but finding out that he was cut off from communication with JARVIS and therefore practically everything else that could help him in his predicament did not necessarily help. At all. Not in the slightest. Oh god, he was going to die and he wouldn´t even be able to heroically whisper last words his AI could record. This was the worst thing that had ever happened to him (any instances in which he had been kidnapped by terrorists/betrayed by his father figure/ had to fly an actual nuke to outer space obviously left out).

For lack of alternatives, Tony opted to try and lay as still as possible, maybe pretend he was already dead to avoid further killing. His nose itched. And to think he had been convinced his week couldn´t possibly become any worse. His bladder chose that moment to remind him that he had drank an entire cup of coffee before leaving the lab last night.

He tried to free himself once again, to no avail. Tony poked his shoulder. Together with his patience, any resemblance of a survival instinct he had acquired during his sleep also seemed to commit suicide. Loki did not move. He poked again. Then went on to move his hands lower on the god´s body to his sides – all the while the sane parts of him screamed to stop; luckily, they were almost non-existent and therefore easily ignored - and started to tickle Loki.

If Tony had not been awake already, he most definitely would have been as he, once again, landed in a very uncomfortable position on the floor. He groaned, looked up, and noticed the speer being held to his throat. Tony was fairly certain that there had not been any speers two seconds ago. And wasn´t Loki´s specialty supposed to be daggers?

It was one of the many moments in which Tony Stark realized, he should really sort out his priorities. Meanwhile, Loki seemed to have his own realization. Which was the one of his own position and the place he was at. Slowly the speer was lowered (not necessarily calming, since that meant it would first point at Tony´s chest and then his groin) and then disappeared completely in a shimmer of green light. Tony was almost sure that the light had been for show. Drama queen. He tried to compensate quickly for his almost-heart-attack.

“Morning sunshine!” His continued survival had to be a good sign. “How´s it going? Personally, my ass hurts, but that´s probably your fault. Must´ve been a wild night, can barely remember it.” His continued survival may not be permanent. He grinned. Loki did not. So he definitely had just signed his own execution papers then, nice to know.

“Why were you disturbing my sleep?” the trickster demanded to know. Seriously.

“Hm, let me think. It might have just a teensy tiny bit to do with the fact that you decided to cuddle and that I kind of need my body to myself.” Tony wished he had the singular eyebrow thing mastered the same way that Natasha, Pepper, and Loki did. Oh well. Loki did not take well to his accusation. At least that´s what Tony thought if he didn´t misinterpreted the way Loki´s skin suddenly flushed a deep red and his mouth opened and closed a few times unintelligently. In the end, he settled on closed. And pouting. Holy fuck, the god of mischief was in his bedroom and pouting. Some things he just couldn´t get used to.

He went on grinning. At this stage it classified as a defence mechanism just as much as when a lizard threw off the tip of its tail. Just slightly less effective.

“Wanna have breakfast? I´m starved.” He got up from the floor and started walking to the door of his room. Just pretend everything is normal. And never turn your back to the murderous trickster god in your room, there´s a good boy. “But then, that´s probably ´cause I haven´t eaten since, like, Tuesday. I´m thinking waffles, you?” Just keep smiling. It´s going great so far.

He somehow managed to get into the living area without screaming, great. Now he just had to find a weapon. A weapon he did not need to summon via JARVIS. Many options there, he was sure. And also really screwed. Awesome. To kill a little bit of time he went to the fridge. And also because he was actually hungry. No reason to die with an empty stomach. Except of course the sad empty state of his fridge. Coffee it was then. He moved on to the machine and removed a cup from the cupboard above. Steps behind him showed, that Loki had followed.

“Do you take yours with or without milk?” Just keep talking, keep him busy. “I always take it black, but that´s just laziness, I think. So, what do yo-“ He abruptly stopped talking after he turned around to find Loki had moved way too far inside his personal space. As in, there was barely any space left between them.

Any semblance of logic disappeared from his ramblings. “Please don´t kill me! I´m really important to the world. And Pepper would murder me if I got killed! I´ll give you anything! Money and technology and, and money. Oh! And I still owe you a drink! Do you want a drink? It´d be a shame if you killed me without even taking your drink. I have this great whiskey, you´d love it. Please don´t throw me out of a window again!

” “A drink would be acceptable.”

“Huh?” What? Tony did not believe what he had just heard. Maybe he had already died and this was the afterlife. Odd setting, but then, what did he know?

“A drink. With you. Or more. Would be acceptable. If you insist.”

Tony needed a few moments to collect himself. He spent those moments just staring at Loki again. He was now sure he was dead. Something this completely crazy could not be happening, ever.

“Did you just ask me on a date?!”

“Yes. I intended to do so yesterday, but you seemed … unavailable.” The expression on Loki´s face could only be described as sheepish. The one on Tony´s as the one of a man who had just walked into his house expecting, well, his house, only to find himself suddenly on the bridge of the USS Enterprise. Carpets included. To summarise, his face resembled something between ‘What the actual fuck’ and ‘This is everything I ever wanted, who cares if I accidentally left my entire family behind’.

“So your solution was to sleep on my bed and use me as a body pillow? Didn´t you say you had to hide from someone?” Given the situation, Tony was very proud of himself for still being able to form sentences. Loki made a vague nodding motion in response.

"I turned out to be more intimidated by the prospect of rejection than originally expected." Loki looked very worried.  


Tony started laughing hysterically. It really was time for that to happen. Loki´s expression became increasingly _more_ worried as Tony started hugging himself and struggled to stay on his feet, shaken by laughter.

“Anthony?”

Tony laughed more. Loki, former prince of Asgard, invader of earth had addressed him by his first name. His full first name. Tears started falling down his face. It took him a few more minutes to calm down again. As calm as he could get at least. Loki still looked worried. And the slightest bit insulted. Oops.

“Sure Lokes, let’s go on a date. Why not. SHIELD´s gonna be thrilled!”

This time, he grinned earnestly. And Loki smiled back. It looked like it would be a nice day.

“Oh, and could you undo whatever it is that happened to JARVIS? I kind of need him.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. This was my first fan-fiction and you probably noticed. I hope you liked it, because I know I didn´t. Have a nice day.


End file.
